Insolent behavior during lessons

said: May 3, 2006
 44 posts

I would like to hear from the teachers how they like this issue handled. My sweet, cooperative, conscientious 10 year old has turned into a sulky, back-talking, insolent 11 year old. We have just come from another lesson where he has said to the teacher things like, “I know, I KNOW!,” and, “I DID do it that way!” I don’t allow him to talk to me in that tone of voice and I don’t want him talking that way to any adult, let alone his teacher. After the last two lessons, I have had a little talk with him about being polite and the correct response to his teacher’s suggestions, but what I want to do is snatch him out of the room right when he does it and talk to him about it right then. The teacher ignores it all—I am sure he has seen and heard plenty worse in his 30 years of teaching, but I don’t want to allow my child to be so disrespectful. How would you teachers like this kind of situation handled?

Diana said: May 4, 2006
Diana Umile
Suzuki Association Member
Coatesville, PA
36 posts

Personally, I prefer that parents allow me to deal with behavior unless it is extreme. I think the parent should address the issue with the child after the lesson. This sounds age-typical to me, and your teacher’g ignoring it is probably what I would do.

Melissa said: May 4, 2006
 Piano, Flute
151 posts

I have to disagree with pianolover on this one.
I think you are handling it very well. And this is what I expect a parent to do.
Maybe pianolover misunderstood your post. But it sounds to me that you dealt with your child’s behaviour after the lesson, not during.
As a teacher I would address this type of behaviour when it occurs, at the lesson. I would not ignore it nor accept it. Children need to know what is appropriate behaviour and what isn’t. I feel it is nice to have a teacher helping the parent out with this, and vice-versa.

Grace said: May 4, 2006
110 posts

I would call the teacher this week and ask him if he has time to discuss your son’s behavior. I think you and the teacher should try to have even a short conversation about what is happening and how you both want to handle it.

Some of my teen and “tween” (10-12 year olds) students start to do the rude comments, rolling eyes, checking their watch every 2 minutes, etc. and I just tell them “you know, it is actually very rude and disrepectful when you… (roll your eyes, etc.) I am trying my best to help you during your lesson time, but I need you to work with me.” Usually, when it comes from the teacher, the kid feels bad and shapes up.

That being said, these students are in the hormone-rollercoaster stage of life. I have at least one girl who is a great kid for 3 lessons, but she almost always has a cranky PMS-lesson every 4th week! After I realized this, I don’t make a big deal of it, and she is fine the following week…

said: May 5, 2006
 44 posts

Thank you all for your input. I will ask the teacher what he would like me to do. I know this behavior comes with the age, but it still is not appro-priate. I just feel that by letting it go at the lesson, even if the teacher ignores it, I am condoning the behavior.

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