Accepting a new violin (4yo)


said: Apr 11, 2007
 13 posts

I started suzuki violin with my son about half a year ago, when he was 3.5 yo. We borrowed a 1/16 violin from a friend, whose children had outgrown it. Now he wants it back since it has sentimental values to the family.

Although my son is not always enthusiastic about playing, he definitely does not want to return the violin, to the point that he starts crying when we speak about it. We have borrowed another violin that is for sale, and it took a lot of persuasion to even try it for size (it is 1/10 I believe). We have also talked about going to the music store to buy a violin—my son is adamant that he wants to buy “his” violin, the one we have been playing since he started.

Any tips on how to proceed? It’s not that easy to practice as it is, he is often resistant but we manage a short practice almost every day, and I fear this will make practice even harder.

Community Youth Orchestra said: Apr 11, 2007
Community Youth OrchestraViolin, Viola
70 posts

At some point here, your son is going to outgrow this instrument. Once that happens, he’ll have to let go in order to continue. If he is in any contact with older players, he’ll see this as students progress from the small to large sizes. In that way, it will be easier to accept once he has some context for it.

If your friend wants it back for sentimental reasons, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to see if they can allow you to borrow it for awhile longer; to a 4 year old taking away their instrument that they started on is a huge deal…it’s like taking away their favorite toy or something!

said: Apr 12, 2007
 13 posts

Thank you for your reply. I’m sure you are right about how time will help, though we’re still far from the moment when his own wish to continue will help him overcome struggles.

Fortunately, my friend is in no hurry to get the violin back. For now we have both the borrowed, slightly larger, and the “old” one available. And my son and I can play on one each. I think he might get used to the idea of a new violin.

Since we have also a younger brother in the family, who seems very interested though he’s barely two, I am also considering buying two violins in different sizes. That way my older son can select the smaller if he’s more comfortable with it, and eventually get used to and start playing on the larger one.

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